So i watched Advent Children (no. 4)
I will never be a meme-ory.
Bienvenue à Rent’s Due! The past week was pretty busy for me due to multiple life things (day job, taxes, making use of a $26.98 Dune 2 bucket). But, to make up for the lack of a Sunday issue, you’ll be getting THREE posts this week instead of the usual two; this one, another one midweek, and a special Sunday post that’ll feel thematically appropriate for your scrolling pleasure. Hope you enjoy!
Spoilers for FF7, Remake and Advent Children below.
I feel like as I’ve gotten older that nostalgia has become alarmingly polarizing for our culture. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, nor is it anything that resembles our constantly-evolving reality. Despite how difficult things may seem for anyone right now (especially for people like me in our mid-20s), we can’t just revert back and pretend that everything was better then. The past serves as prologue for a better tomorrow. That applies to anything, really. And in light of my time finally getting my grubby little hands on playing Final Fantasy VII Rebirth, that feeling doesn’t feel more prevalent than after watching Advent Children.
Insert Data Disc.
My introduction to Final Fantasy VII was a little scattered compared to most people. I grew up play some RPGs here and there across my childhood like Kingdom Hearts or Wind Waker, but they weren’t anything that I cared enough to actually sit down and beat1. I remember staring at my computer throughout E3 weekend in 2015 and getting what could only be described as second-hand hype from FF7 Remake’s reveal trailer. I’d known a bit about the game and the impact it made, but if I was already dismissive about finishing games from my current era, it was doubly so with RPGs from the SNES/PS1 era. Back then I would rather wait for a modern remake to come out instead of finding some way to play the OG. That sentiment kinda worked out, because now I had these shiny-looking graphics and the *thought* of playing with a big pointy sword with my friend who’s got a gun for a hand. So I waited, waited all over again, and waited some more until the game finally came out on April 10, 2020.
At this point in my life I had a ton of sudden free time and played the original on my Switch, and stopped up until I reached the halfway point on Midgar. I wanted to savor some of what I didn’t know about the game that weren’t podcast clips or Smash memes2, and experience the newest version of the game with fresh eyes. Despite the hilarious fact that Remake was actually a stealth sequel to the original, it was still an incredible entry point for me to get used to Cloud Strife and the gang3. I obviously had more questions after beating Remake (How is Zack still alive? Who’s Zack?), so in the years between that and the impending arrival of Rebirth, I took up the time to play more of OG FF7.
If I didn’t make this clear already, I was blatantly selective about what I wanted to know about anything related to FF7, despite knowing a lot about what happens in the game itself. I didn’t know much about the spin-offs or what “the compilation” was, and for the longest time I didn’t even know that AC was a sequel film to the game! The only things that I knew about it were the mixed reception it received upon release and Sephiroth’s reveal trailer for Smash Bros. Ultimate. And hoo boy, what a trailer it still is. Cool anime dudes flying around, swinging at each other with long ass swords, saying nonsensical shit like “Stay where you belong, in my memories”. I loved all three minutes of that, so maybe I’d also dig 100 minutes of that exact thing. So when I found out that my local AMC was playing the English dub4 of Advent Children Complete for one night only, I figured why not? I knew I’d be a little confused because I didn’t know much about the game’s finale and who *else* was dead or alive after it, but I decided to come in with an open mind and see what held up for a 19-year-old movie with a tepid following.
The answer: some stuff and not a lot else, but in a way that feels oddly endearing.
“Motherrrrrrr”
Advent Children Complete is a confusing film that’s apparently less confusing than its original version. There’s a lot(!) of action and AMV-coded imagery that would pair nicely with Tool’s 10,000 Days, but it’s also a movie about how Cloud has to stop the main Sephiroth ghost clone/brother of three (who’s also Sephiroth if the obvious flash cuts weren’t a given) from reuniting with some magic lifestream water, bringing about more homeless kids to die from a disease called "Geostigma"5. Also everyone has a nice Nokia flip-phone for some reason.
There’s some elements in this that work well in concept, like Cloud having to reconcile with the guilt he feels over losing Aerith, and even the funny laid-back moments watching Reno and Rude react to all the crazy shit that’s going on around them, but the film has a problem with trying to balance a meaty story about legacy and growth while also being an 80% action tech-demo that shows how far cutscenes have gotten since 1997. And grayness aside, the film still looks great! It feels like the best thing to put on a PSP UMD disc and let your brain sleep which you watch it, a genuinely-welcomed staple from 2005 sci-fi movies.
But I’d be lying if I thought that the plot at times didn’t have me scratching my skull. The film wants to be about how Cloud needs other people in his life like Tifa and Denzel need him, but he’s the only one who has to fight Nu-Sephiroth6 while the gang looks on in their airship and fucks off? Barret’s an eco-terrorist who wants to free the Mako energy being used by Shinra, but he’s making oilfields with Cid? Rufus is in a wheelchair and has his face hidden because he wanted to? And he looks the same?? I don’t even want to talk about Denzel or the fact that a dude named Yazoo shot Cloud in the face (with a gun!) only for his sunglasses to fly off instead. Look at this moment from the trailer, what the fuck does that even mean?! We didn’t even get the cool bike shot (see: above) from the TGS trailer, something I’m going to be randomly upset about now when I think about this film.
And yet: for all of AC’s flaws, the team at Square-Enix were able to take what they learned and used it to their advantage with the Remake trilogy, itself released at a point in video game history where everything now looks like you’re playing a better-looking version of AC. While the visuals of FF7 were something that sold people on playing it, the real strength in the franchise has always been the relationships you make along the way. The people you fight alongside with and the tender moments you share that almost feel as if we’re really there. That sense of kinship was lost in Advent Children, but it was remembered in Remake and what I’ve played so far in Rebirth, alongside all the cool flippy shit that also makes it special. We even got a version of that cool bike shot with the Roche boss fight, itself the perfect synthesis of memorable character moments and over-the-top mid-00s Anime Edge™. There was gold in the mines of Advent Children, and thankfully, with time, they learned to use the best of it, and grow into something familiar yet new.
For some reason, both my GameCube and PS2 had no save cards slotted in, something I didn’t realize I needed in order for me to progress with my games. So each time my goofy 6yo ass sat down to play Melee before school, I’d always be confused as to why I needed to unlock Luigi every time I played.
Yes even that fucking pear joke, which has no right to have lasted this long. Still funny tho.
It’s still about as confusing as trying to watch Star Wars for the first time and starting at Return of the Jedi.
A notoriously bad dub btw. Big shock I know, but there’s always something charming about hearing an overacted voice say “Yeah!” and try to make it sound cool.
It’s just the kids and Cloud that get Geostigma, which for the most part just makes them look dirty and cough a lot.
Who might be the same Sephy from the Remake continuity? Idk I haven’t gotten that far.